From Sherlock Holmes Esq to Dr J Watson:
Watson – I am impressed! – You are certainly beginning to use your grey matter in a manner fitting a true investigator – I offer my congratulations heartily, but with, of course, slightly grudging admiration, as you of all people know my inherent fear of having my accolades usurped…..even by my closest – doubtless you will say – only – friend.
Be that as it may, I have to reveal the true perpetrator of the jape as none other than our sometime collaborator Inspector McRae, whose intention, in his own words, was to “tak’ some of the air fae that windbag Watson” and “tak’ some o’ the stuffing oot ‘ees mealie-puddin’s” – whatever that may mean; he assured me it was all in good fun and held no malice aforethought whatsoever; however, with the intervention of time, I am beginning to suspect his intentions were not so pure, as a subsequent communication from his Office has hinted at a slight whiff of unhealthy hero-worship, and I am beginning to come to the conclusion that the whole incident was engineered in an attempt to weaken the strong bond which has remained steadfast and true through all our adventures and perils together, and which up till now, has managed to resist every attempt to rent said ties asunder.
However, we must put such petty matters aside to concentrate on more pressing situations – namely this case which you outlined briefly in your last missive; I shall therefore be at 221B this evening, poised and ready to receive your interpretation, fuelled by Mrs Hudson’s Premium Apple Turnovers, Mixed-fruit Muffins and Cockle Comforts – not to mention several pots of Builders’ Tea and a French Fancy to finish. Trusting your appetite is commensurate with the prospect.
Your friend, somewhat world-weary, SH.